Personal Freedom: Part II


Personal Freedom: Part II 

August 30, 2019

I had an unexpected opportunity 2 weeks ago to participate in an online Masterclass by Marie Diamond, “How to Instantly Apply Feng Shui in Your Life”, offered by MindValley. For the last 25 years Marie has been a Feng Shui Master and coached hundreds of thousands of students worldwide, top public speakers, international best-selling authors, celebrities in the music and movie industry, and top athletes. I can only say, WOW! This class took all the energy work I have been doing to a higher level. I spent 10 days learning from the 8 Videos and applying the lessons of de-cluttering, energy flows and rearranging furniture, pictures, etc., in my entryway, living room, dining room, bedroom, and my office Loft. I was caught up in an energy vortex and totally immersed in flow and change. That is the short version of my story for the unexpected hiatus in my regular Blog schedule. 

More on what I learned to come in future Blogs.

For now I want to return to my plan to delve deeper into why Personal Freedom is so important on the path to personal motivation and growth. 

While there are many paths to Personal Freedom, they all have one thing in common – they all are action oriented and the work is all on your “inner empire.” In other words, Personal Freedom is not dependent on your current circumstances – where you live, what job you have, how much money you make, and your relationship status. Personally, I believe the great leader Nelson Mandela found his Personal Freedom along the way of introspection in his 17 years in jail on Robben Island. The impact was historic. 

I like to use the analogy of “filling your cup” compared to “emptying your cup.” Personal change and growth involves both taking action to bring new habits and initiatives into your life and letting go of old habits and limiting beliefs. Some people think – with sound logic -- that you must first empty the cup before you can fill the cup.

I learned a counter-intuitive path many years ago when I used a communications coach to work with my staff and myself on presentation skills. Because people are usually self-conscious and self-critical when they see themselves on video, his approach was to  emphasize the persons’ positive skills and build on them. This coach never said, “stop doing… such and such.” His philosophy and experience were that when people build on their skills, learn new competencies and are encouraged --- the “good” will push out the “bad.” Does that make sense to you? 

Let us contrast 2 paths to Personal Freedom – and I have personally walked both paths. They are not mutually exclusive. However, they are very different approaches:

  • Bring in the New: The course, Declarations, is a great example of going within and bringing in the new. This approach was outlined in my Blog earlier this month. 
  • Out with the Old: This path goes within and involves letting go of old behaviors and limiting beliefs.This approach is our focus in Personal Freedom: Part II. 

First, a brief review of the Bring in the New path. I outlined a new course offering, Declarations,” which is loosely based on The Motivation Manifesto: 9 Declarations to Claim Your Personal Power, by best-selling author and internationally renowned motivational coach, Brendon Burchard. In this course, with 12 one-on-one meetings, you  have an opportunity to delve deeper into Freedom, Fear, and Motivation. You  also explore what the “9 Declarations to Claim Your Personal Power,” mean to you, and what next steps are important to moving from where you are to where you want to be. From the Motivation Manifesto by Brendon Burchard, the 9 Declarations are:  

  1. Meet Life with Full Presence and Purpose
  2. Reclaim Your Agenda
  3. Defeat your Demons
  4. Advance with Abandon
  5. Practice Joy and Gratitude
  6. Do Not Break Integrity
  7. Amplify Love
  8. Inspire Greatness
  9. Slow Time 

This course is action-oriented and future focused. 

Whether you choose to enroll in my course, Declarations, or listen to the online lectures and meditations by Tara Brach on "Gladdening the Mind" or by Rick Hanson on "Growing the Good" -- these are all  resources for "filling your cup" -- till it runneth over with joy and freedom. 

Now let’s explore what is involved in the process "Out With the Old" -- the process of letting go. Letting go has many dimensions and levels. Here is a short list: 

  1. Letting Go of Control of the Outcome
  2. Letting Go of Anger, Blame and Resentments
  3. Letting Go of Expectations
  4. Letting go of Perfection
  5. Letting Go of Invalidation:
    •  I Am Not Good Enough; Self-Doubt
    • Self-criticism
  6. Letting Go of Judgement
  7. Letting Go of Fear:
    • Of Failure
    • Of Regrets
    • Of Worries About the Future
    • Of Rejection
    • Of Death
    • Of Love

This might appear to be a daunting list of challenges. It is possible you might want to quit before you even get started! Not so fast -- we have all been there.  There are a multitude of resources and coaches out there for you. Just as one example among many, I have written 5 separate Blogs in the past year and published an award winning book in 2017 on these challenges, which we all face.   

This is where courage and commitment come in! You have a choice – the most important point is to decide what is a fit for you – and to commit, persevere and be consistent. 

In my book, Be Happy NOW!: From Wall Street Ambition and the Illusion of Success, My Path to Happiness, I share my top 6 experiential lessons. This is my personal experience of a proprietary framework created by my coach and co-author, David Prudhomme.  “The Best Me Now® is a blended approach, which both helps you empty the cup – let go of negative and limiting beliefs – and fill the cup -- learning how to take back control, how to forgive, how to practice and experience gratitude and unconditional love. These are my top 6 experiential lessons as revealed in Be Happy NOW!

  1. Chapter 5: The Power to Choose: I learned how to take back control of my emotions thoughts and behaviors, rather than reacting to people and situations based on old habits and patterns. I learned how to choose to live a healthier and happier life. Breathing, a daily gratitude practice, guided visualization and future pacing are all part of this important first step. 

  2. Chapter 6: Let Go and Take Control: I learned how to let go of old hurts and anger and the suffering of losing a loved one. Starting my morning in peace and silence, incorporating daily meditation, staying in the present moment are all important pieces of this second step. I can choose love only when I have let go of all negative, limiting emotions and beliefs, such as anger, resentment, loneliness loss and feelings of "I am not good enough." When I let go, I take control and have the power to choose from a loving heart.

  3. Chapter 7: Forgive and Be Free: I learned how to forgive myself and others. Letting go of my ego, expectations, judgments and learning to accept people and things as they are were integral to learning how to forgive. I start choosing my words more carefully, eliminating the "shoulds" and the "you make me feel" -- all the red flag words that signal judgment. I start using words like "splendiferous" more frequently to shape my view of the world. When I simply accept, do not judge others or myself, when I give goodness, peace and trust, there is nothing to forgive, and I am free. 

  4. Chapter 8: Release and Rejoice: I learned how to release deep-seated fears. This is deep. In an age-regression hypnosis session I am guided by David to "snip" the thread of fear that traced back to the womb and I experience an amazing emotional release. I learned that by releasing fear, I see the world with new eyes and experience life with a new heart. My faith starts to blossom.

  5. Chapter 9: Look Within and Love Me: I learned how to find peace in the present moment and what it feels like to unconditionally love yourself and others. My daily gratitudes and meditation practices are going deeper and deeper. As I shed my armor, my negative and limiting beliefs, I start to feel my connection to everyone and everything. 

  6. Chapter 10: I Am Not Special: I learned I am not alone – I am never alone. I learned how to connect with everyone by seeing we are all the same. God is in everyone, everything, and everywhere. I learned that I am unique rather than special.

These are lessons I continue to learn at deeper levels – and re-learn when I regress.

The key point: there are many paths to Personal Freedom. You have choices. My focus is to give you an overview of choices to explore what is the best fit for you. The paths can be chosen individually, sequentially or blended. You decide. The most important point: get started, persevere, and be consistent.

Here are a few more resources, because meditation can be a powerful tool on your journey. It is important to find the teachers who have a voice and content that fits your objectives. I also tend to use guided meditations which is a blend of teachings and silence or mantras.

I have found wonderful meditations and courses on my favorite app, Insight Timer, which I would like to share with you. I work on rewiring my neural networks every day. I am persistent and consistent.   

Let’s start with a short list of selected meditations I have used.  [Important reminder: the links will only work on your mobile platform. If you are reading this Blog on your computer, please copy and paste the link and text to your phone to access.]

  1. Kenneth Soares:
  1. Davidji:
  2. Sarah Blondin: 
  3. Rick Hanson: Feeling Good About Yourself:  

There are also 3 Courses, I highly recommend:

  1. David Gandelman: The Energetics Of Success & Manifestation - Release limitations around what success means and learn powerful tools to manifest a fulfilling and purposeful life. In this 30-day course, lessons 9-15 are all on the process of letting go. 
  1. Fleur Chambers: Break Free From Your Limiting Beliefs - Break free from habitual patterns of thinking to experience greater awareness, freedom and wellbeing, a 10-day course:  

  2. Tara Brach: Free Yourself From Blame and Resentment, a 10-day course:

My purpose today is to create a roster of resources as you walk your path to Personal Freedom. I have personally explored and benefited from all of these resources over many years. It is a journey. In my experience, I hear different voices, differently. I hear different points more clearly at different times in my journey.

You have a choice. You decide.

Whichever path you start on – the most important thing is to start… to persevere and to be consistent.

I celebrate you for your courage and initiative!

Till next time,  

May you be happy now and always 

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