ENERGY: Release and Be Free

ENERGY: Release and Be Free

October 23 2018 

Picking up where we left off on October 16th: We are in the 4^th and final quarter of 2018. Let us create the ENERGY to Finish Strong!

I love this quote by St. John of the Cross:

             “The weight of arrogance is such that no bird can fly carrying it.”

This goes to the heart of my message in this newsletter: There is great power and energy when we learn to let go – to be free and fly.  

I am an experiential learner – I learn at a deeper level when I both read and experience the lesson. For this reason, I am including extra doses of meditations as a companion for you to both reflect on the ideas and to experience … the experience of “letting go”.  

Here goes. My next 3 tips to dramatically increase your energy are to bring a higher level of awareness and intention to: 

• Tip #4: Releasing Stress
• Tip #5: Releasing Judgement and Forgiving Others and Yourself
• Tip #6: Releasing Attachments and Letting Go 

I want to acknowledge, up front, there are no quick and easy solutions in these last tips. All of our work on the “Inner Empire” – is work which only we can do for ourselves.  

My point is that by bringing increased attention and intention to our work on releasing stress, releasing judgment and forgiving others, and releasing attachments and letting go, we can and will bring new energy into all of our actions and interactions.

My personal experience – as I have come back to the lesson of letting go many times over the past 8 years – is that sometimes I need to learn the same lesson over and over again. And, sometimes I learn the lesson at deeper and deeper levels. Have I progressed? Yes. Have I regressed? Yes. Am I a work in progress? Yes. It is humbling work.

And, when you are at your Best – when you are the best you can be, when your energy lifts up the energy of every person when you enter a room – WOW! It is all about connection and sharing and lifting everyone up. That is ENERGY – in my humble opinion.

Tip #4: Releasing Stress   

Earlier this summer in 4 Blog posts, I have shared some thoughts on releasing stress, both from my practice as a Certified Stress Management Specialist in The From Stressed to Best^™ framework as well as tips from other experts in the field. 

So, I will take a short-cut here and refer you to those Blog posts. 

1. June 18^th, Managing Your Stress: One Size Does Not Fit All
2. July 3^rd,  Your Invitation to a Party: Laughter Meditation
3. July 17^th, Take Back Control: How to Escape the Flight/Fight Response Response
4. July 30^th, Destressifying

My personal conclusion is that we are all saying essentially the same thing – just a little differently. The tools are quite similar – and they have differences. It is up to YOU to decide what tools work best for you. 

The great news is we have a wide array of well-grounded and well-researched tools to choose from that have proven track records in helping people manage their everyday stress. 

The most important point: Stress is one of the top 3 health issues in the world according to the World Health Organization. This is your one precious life – take action. It can be as simple as following our 7x-7x-7x formula – 7 deep diaphragmatic breaths, 7 times a day, 7 days a week. Then go from there.

A few of my favorite meditations on releasing stress from excellent teachers, with different styles are:

1. Jason McGrice: Melting Stress, Fear and Anxiety
2. Davidji: Change is the Only Constant
3. David Gandelman from Grounded Mind:  What To Do With Stress

One of my favorite quotes by Jon Kabat-Zin: “You can’t stop the waves, but you can learn how to surf.”                                                                     

I start every group presentation on stress management with this quote, so participants have an answer when someone invariably asks them the question: “So, what did you do today?” They have an answer which is both surprising and fun – “I learned how to surf today!”

Tip #5: Releasing Judgement and Forgiving Others and Yourself

I devoted an entire chapter in “Be Happy NOW!: From Wall Street Ambition and the Illusion of Success”  to my early experience in understanding and learning forgiveness of others and myself. This one "tip" could be an entire book.

We all have our stories and challenges of learning how to forgive others and ourselves. I share my personal stories in “Be Happy NOW!” It was very important to me to ask for forgiveness of my mother – from a “hurt” – from many, many years ago. As with many hurts or resentments – this was a self-inflicted wound. 

When I started to work on my Inner Empire and better understand forgiveness, I realized I did not have a Role Model for forgiveness growing up. Who is your Role model for forgiveness in your family – in your life? 

In my view, it is important to first understand what forgiveness is not. For example, forgiveness is not saying it is okay; it is not saying that the hurtful behavior doesn’t matter; it is not about forgetting. Forgiveness is not the same as healing – often it can take some time for the hurt to heal.

Forgiveness is more about letting go of grudges and negative emotions. I came to learn that all the emotions which can be called up when we are not yet ready to forgive someone or ourselves -- emotions such as righteousness, resentment, anger, hatred -- are all “poisons”, or toxins which are damaging to ourselves – physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. .

In one of my hypnotherapy sessions with my guide and coauthor, David Prudhomme, where we focused on forgiveness, as I came out of trance, my 2 take-aways were:

“Now I Know – forgiveness 
Now I Feel – I truly love myself.”

And, this is exactly when I said –“I feel splendiferous!” The release of all the negative emotions -- the feeling of love and joy – the creation of positive energy that comes when you forgive others and/or yourself – is powerful.

We each have to find our own path to forgiveness. There are a couple of well-defined steps. First is an awareness of judgement. Be aware of all the judgmental words you or others use – such as “should”, or “you hurt me…” Second, is the awareness of who and why you need to forgive. Third, is the realization and the intention that forgiveness is a gift you – and only you – can give yourself.

The moment of forgiveness – is a moment of grace. At least that is my personal experience.

A couple of my favorite meditations -- and I wanted to include teachings from the Christian as well as the Buddhist wisdom traditions – are  

1. David Cole: A Meditation on the Lord's Prayer
2. Jack Kornfield: Forgiveness Meditation

One of my favorite quotes on forgiveness is from the opening to Chapter 7, “Forgive and Be Free In Be Happy NOW!”

 “Judge not, and you shall not be judged. 
Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. 
Forgive, and you will be forgiven; 
Give and it will be given to you.”

--Jesus of Nazareth, Luke 6:37-38

Tip #6: Releasing Attachments and Letting Go 

The inspiration for Tip # 6, Releasing Attachments and Letting Go, is found in Chapter 10, I AM Not Special from "Be Happy NOW!", my personal journey of transformation, coauthored with my guide David Prudhomme. I open this chapter with the quote from a poem titled "Arrogance" by St. John of the Cross. It is a beautiful poem:

 "The weight of arrogance is such that no bird can fly carrying it.
And the man who feels superior to others, that man cannot dance,
the real dance when the soul takes God into its arms and you both fall onto your knees in gratitude,
a blessed gratitude for life."  

Whatever word you may choose -- be that arrogance, ego, self-importance, righteousness, etc. -- you are implicitly putting distance between yourself and others. 

To me there is a big difference between saying each of us is unique and my intention when I used to think "I am special." The gradual realization that I am not special meant shedding my protective coat of armor, opening myself and my heart up to others, owning my vulnerability, surrendering -- all leading to letting go of attachments, accepting, trusting and feeling that I am One with the Universe, One with the energy of the Universe. 

To me, letting go does not mean that I don't own anything. Rather it means that nothing owns me. I hope that makes sense. 

In closing, I will share a few of my favorite meditations on letting go:

1.  Sarah Blondin: Healing Through Letting Go
2. David Gandelman: Meditation for Beginners: Letting Go
3. David Gandelman: 10-Day Course: Letting Go of Attachment; available for purchase on Insight Timer for $4.99 for one-time access or $19.99 to own forever. 

I invite you to be with me, and feel the energy, joy and happiness as you walk your unique path. 

Till next time, 

 May you be happy now and always, Alison 

P.S. Please consider forwarding this newsletter to friends and family and business associates. Send this link and invite them to hit the Subscribe button on my website:www.AlisonLanzaFalls.com.

P.P. S.: Here is a link from my website to preview and purchase our book, “Be Happy NOW!” https://www.alisonlanzafalls.com/p/be-happy-now.